Venvonknurt is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, sapient tapir.

Venvonknurt created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Venvonknurt, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Venvonknurt, it will boil you in a big pot.

Venvonknurt's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Venvonknurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in the presence of frogs.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never mention tapirs.