Matdogsag is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, boastful squirrel.

Matdogsag created the cosmos three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Matdogsag, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Matdogsag, it will throw large rocks at you.

Matdogsag's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Matdogsag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gold on your body.

2. Never skip near squirrels.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not drink water in white rooms.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.