Cepmitrip is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, prudent troll.

Cepmitrip created the world six million years ago.

If you believe in Cepmitrip, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cepmitrip, she will turn you into a plant.

Cepmitrip's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Cepmitrip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Cepmitrip's name in vain.

2. Never talk about dark matter near snakes while wearing red rings.

3. Worship no other gods but Cepmitrip.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never write about dwarf planets.