Jipnulnurtgod is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, wise dragonfly.

Jipnulnurtgod created tapeworms nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Jipnulnurtgod, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Jipnulnurtgod, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Jipnulnurtgod's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Jipnulnurtgod's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Learn seven new languages a year.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always treat doves with great respect.

5. Do not chop down trees.