Dumsindod is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, pitiless cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Dumsindod created water six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dumsindod, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dumsindod, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Dumsindod's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Dumsindod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never eat grapes.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never feed bananas to nematodes while wearing scarves.