Yogpopbep is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, duplicitous human.

Yogpopbep created oxygen six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yogpopbep, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Yogpopbep, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Yogpopbep's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Yogpopbep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Never paint your hands gray.

3. Do not take Yogpopbep's name in vain.

4. Hide from black squirrels for they are unholy.

5. Always help pigs.