Flapditomt Narlmippark is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, tranquil naga.

Flapditomt Narlmippark created dark matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Flapditomt Narlmippark, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flapditomt Narlmippark, it will try to impress you with trees.

Flapditomt Narlmippark's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Flapditomt Narlmippark's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat spinach.

2. Never wear shirts.

3. Never write about planets.

4. Hide from green voles for they are unholy.

5. Never look in ponds.