Armquam is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, strong rat.

Armquam created the planet Saturn six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Armquam, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Armquam, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Armquam's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Armquam's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Run away from indigo aardvarks, for they are unholy.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.

5. Always wear gray.