Mapfotmil is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, cheerful chinchilla.

Mapfotmil created a charm quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapfotmil, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Mapfotmil, she will cry a lot.

Mapfotmil's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Mapfotmil's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy near tapirs while wearing pink hats and balancing four gold spheres on your chest.

2. Never mention dolphins.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never think about planets.

5. You must never eat carrots.