Cadyarfotsas is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, quiet tortoise.

Cadyarfotsas created the Black Eye Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Cadyarfotsas, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Cadyarfotsas, he will not care.

Cadyarfotsas' most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Cadyarfotsas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.

3. Never write about fluid mechanics.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.