Satsuggub is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, competent bat.

Satsuggub created the Tadpole Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Satsuggub, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Satsuggub, he will destroy your favourite star.

Satsuggub's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Satsuggub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum gravity.

2. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

3. Erect three platinum sculptures of Satsuggub on top of important buildings.

4. You must pray to Satsuggub nine times a day.

5. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Satsuggub in the centre of the settlement.