Dammiskopshavgudmab is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, thoughtless gnu.

Dammiskopshavgudmab created the planet Venus two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dammiskopshavgudmab, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dammiskopshavgudmab, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Dammiskopshavgudmab's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Dammiskopshavgudmab's Holy Commandments

1. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never wear shorts.

4. Never think about special relativity.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.