Cimnatjan is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, grumpy chicken.

Cimnatjan created the planet Saturn two years ago.

If you believe in Cimnatjan, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cimnatjan, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cimnatjan's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Cimnatjan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never hop in the presence of mice.

5. Never wear orange boots.