Bafloopnelldontim is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, omnipotent hydra.

Bafloopnelldontim created everything that exists six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bafloopnelldontim, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bafloopnelldontim, he will refuse to believe in you.

Bafloopnelldontim's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Bafloopnelldontim's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never think about asteroids.

4. Do not shave your face.

5. Do not cook food in pots.