Janpogwip is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, amazing toad.

Janpogwip created the planet Mars seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Janpogwip, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Janpogwip, he will turn you into a tree.

Janpogwip's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Janpogwip's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four ants approach from the south.

2. Never talk about solid mechanics near sharks while wearing magenta rings.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.