Kemominfom is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, weak seal.

Kemominfom created Asia four billion years ago.

If you believe in Kemominfom, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kemominfom, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Kemominfom's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Kemominfom's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never mention gulls.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Learn five new languages a year.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near great tits while wearing pink shoes and balancing four gold spheres on your back.