Bossquillzod is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, idiotic chicken.

Bossquillzod created the Whirlpool Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bossquillzod, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bossquillzod, it will turn you into a rock.

Bossquillzod's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Bossquillzod's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy near great tits while wearing orange dresses and balancing nine titanium spheres on your arms.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Put Bossquillzod first in all things.

5. Always pray immersed in water.