Jondumkansogsigfub is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, uncaring hare.

Jondumkansogsigfub created a photon four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jondumkansogsigfub, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Jondumkansogsigfub, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Jondumkansogsigfub's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Jondumkansogsigfub's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Feed all hungry pigs.