Yarltinnad is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, strong dove.

Yarltinnad created the solar system five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarltinnad, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Yarltinnad, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Yarltinnad's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Yarltinnad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near ants while wearing magenta corsets and balancing three copper spheres on your chest.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Seals are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always stare at clouds.