Bedvadcam is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, unsympathetic armadillo.

Bedvadcam created dark matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Bedvadcam, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bedvadcam, she will turn you into a dog.

Bedvadcam's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Bedvadcam's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never think about electromagnetism.

3. Never hurt dogs.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Put Bedvadcam first in all things.