Tarnilltag is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, omniscient elephant.

Tarnilltag created the Sombrero Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tarnilltag, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Tarnilltag, she will jump up and down on your head.

Tarnilltag's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Tarnilltag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep seven pigs in a large pit.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

3. Never sing in holy places.

4. Run away if six badgers approach from the west.

5. Do not drink water in pink rooms.