Zimjatdub is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, generous hippopotamus.

Zimjatdub created the planet Jupiter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimjatdub, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zimjatdub, he will boil you in a big pot.

Zimjatdub's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Zimjatdub's Holy Commandments

1. Zimjatdub loves geese, so they must be honoured.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never think about enzymes.

5. Always treat bats with great respect.