Bunjapflan is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, slow lobster.

Bunjapflan created energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bunjapflan, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bunjapflan, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Bunjapflan's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Bunjapflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never talk about moons.

3. Bunjapflan loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.