Yammumarf Cimbiggun is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, caring dove.

Yammumarf Cimbiggun created bats three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yammumarf Cimbiggun, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yammumarf Cimbiggun, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Yammumarf Cimbiggun's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Yammumarf Cimbiggun's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms cyan.

2. Never look at planets.

3. Yammumarf Cimbiggun loves monkeys, so they must be respected.

4. Always help grasshopers in need.

5. Never think about dark matter near ants while wearing black shoes and balancing four platinum spheres on your hands.