Cinsadnab is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, generous newt.

Cinsadnab created the world six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cinsadnab, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cinsadnab, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cinsadnab's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Cinsadnab's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear black.

2. Never wear blue trousers.

3. Do not take Cinsadnab's name in vain.

4. Never go into violet rooms.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.