Jabbafyat is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, passionate gnu.

Jabbafyat created Africa three million years ago.

If you believe in Jabbafyat, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Jabbafyat, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Jabbafyat's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Jabbafyat's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear violet.

2. Never feed strawberries to dogs while wearing cyan tights.

3. Do not dye your hair mauve.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics.

5. Hide if six hamsters approach from the east.