Flatraggep Quimlogxuc is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, tiresome parrot.

Flatraggep Quimlogxuc created a down quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatraggep Quimlogxuc, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Flatraggep Quimlogxuc, it will torture you forever.

Flatraggep Quimlogxuc's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Flatraggep Quimlogxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear platinum on your body.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not take Flatraggep Quimlogxuc's name in vain.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate swans.

5. Never eat grapes.