Jangamstanmumyiknatxuckpop is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, dishonourable tapir.

Jangamstanmumyiknatxuckpop created vertebrates three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jangamstanmumyiknatxuckpop, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jangamstanmumyiknatxuckpop, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Jangamstanmumyiknatxuckpop's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Jangamstanmumyiknatxuckpop's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.