Madditmon Ratbamdum is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, thoughtless pigeon.

Madditmon Ratbamdum created a down quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Madditmon Ratbamdum, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Madditmon Ratbamdum, she will strike you with lightening.

Madditmon Ratbamdum's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Madditmon Ratbamdum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Mites are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Do not speak about wheat.