Kipnarzansitrulstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, uncaring centipede.

Kipnarzansitrulstaf created the planet Jupiter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kipnarzansitrulstaf, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kipnarzansitrulstaf, he will turn you into a rock.

Kipnarzansitrulstaf's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Kipnarzansitrulstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Kipnarzansitrulstaf loves sheep, so they must be honoured.

2. Always help swans.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Kipnarzansitrulstaf.

4. Never sit near mites.

5. Fast once a month.