Hanyarpgon is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, grumpy capybara.

Hanyarpgon created the Cigar Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Hanyarpgon, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hanyarpgon, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Hanyarpgon's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Hanyarpgon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about dwarf planets.

2. Always make sure there are no swans in a building before entering it.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about ultrasonics near squirrels while wearing mauve jumpers and balancing six lead spheres on your arms.

5. Never write about quantum field theory.