Rowtofnad is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unfair manatee.

Rowtofnad created a top quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rowtofnad, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Rowtofnad, he will manifest in front of you.

Rowtofnad's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Rowtofnad's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Rowtofnad in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always help sick cats.

4. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

5. Never feed lentils to mice while wearing corsets.