Fag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, omniscient camel.

Fag created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fag, she will turn you into a mouse.

Fag's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Fag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your face.

2. Never mention snails.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Seals are not to be trusted.

5. Hide if nine frogs approach from the west.