Piglarnlam is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, compassionate armadillo.

Piglarnlam created the Andromeda Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Piglarnlam, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Piglarnlam, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Piglarnlam's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Piglarnlam's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt birds.

2. Run away if four otters approach from the south.

3. Never wear tights.

4. Do not eat lentils.

5. Do not dye your hair orange.