Padxenkem Bodgeprul is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, moody finch.

Padxenkem Bodgeprul created dark energy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Padxenkem Bodgeprul, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Padxenkem Bodgeprul, it will cry a lot.

Padxenkem Bodgeprul's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Padxenkem Bodgeprul's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into green rooms.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not listen to music.