Madtonmab is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, ruthless porpoise.

Madtonmab created a down quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Madtonmab, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Madtonmab, he will strike you with lightening.

Madtonmab's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Madtonmab's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Madtonmab.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not eat grapes.