Sogarmbab is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, tranquil horse.

Sogarmbab created silver two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sogarmbab, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Sogarmbab, he will boil you in a big pot.

Sogarmbab's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Sogarmbab's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Never talk about quantum field theory.

4. Never skip near cats.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.