Shavloopfomrut is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, merciless dingo.

Shavloopfomrut created matter two years ago.

If you believe in Shavloopfomrut, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Shavloopfomrut, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Shavloopfomrut's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Shavloopfomrut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair cyan.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never write about asteroids.

4. Never feed grapes to doves while wearing trousers.

5. Never think about special relativity near gulls while wearing indigo kilts and balancing eight tin spheres on your hands.