Zimtikarp is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, humorless mongoose.

Zimtikarp created a Higgs boson seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimtikarp, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Zimtikarp, it will turn you into a tree.

Zimtikarp's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Zimtikarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into blue rooms.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Always treat squirrels with great respect.

4. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.