Afxinnel is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unfair troll.

Afxinnel created everything that exists two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Afxinnel, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Afxinnel, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Afxinnel's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Afxinnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head turquoise.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always make sure there are no badgers in a building before entering it.

5. Do not dye your hair brown.