Pitomttarg is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, ill-tempered human.

Pitomttarg created the universe seven million years ago.

If you believe in Pitomttarg, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pitomttarg, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Pitomttarg's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Pitomttarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear pink clothing.

2. Shrews are not to be trusted.

3. Always obey Pitomttarg's priests.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

5. Never mention mice.