Neghigyokpinquatyarpcunnib is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, weak dugong.

Neghigyokpinquatyarpcunnib created time and space four years ago.

If you believe in Neghigyokpinquatyarpcunnib, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Neghigyokpinquatyarpcunnib, she will throw large rocks at you.

Neghigyokpinquatyarpcunnib's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Neghigyokpinquatyarpcunnib's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not wear gray clothing.

3. Never talk about thermodynamics near porpoises while wearing orange shirts and balancing seven titanium spheres on your head.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not keep six manatees in a large pit.