Mongonmabing is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, quiet badger.

Mongonmabing created the planet Earth nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Mongonmabing, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Mongonmabing, it will not care at all.

Mongonmabing's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Mongonmabing's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never laugh in the presence of sheep.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not eat onions.