Quafhatjen is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, confident skunk.

Quafhatjen created an up quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafhatjen, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quafhatjen, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Quafhatjen's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Quafhatjen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Snails are not to be trusted.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Fast once a month.