Zanlikdud is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, sage salamander.

Zanlikdud created the Andromeda Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Zanlikdud, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Zanlikdud, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Zanlikdud's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Zanlikdud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zanlikdud's name in vain.

2. Hide if nine horses approach from the north.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Never feed peas to tortoises while wearing brown dresses.

5. Respect your elders.