Fomcimjen is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, self-assured gerbil.

Fomcimjen created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fomcimjen, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fomcimjen, it will try to impress you with trees.

Fomcimjen's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Fomcimjen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity near whales while wearing cyan kilts and balancing four silver spheres on your arms.

2. Do not wear violet clothing.

3. Do not kill birds.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never feed lots of carrots to manatees while wearing turquoise rings.