Fotlansit is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, proud meerkat.

Fotlansit created vertebrates nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fotlansit, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fotlansit, it will turn you into a mole.

Fotlansit's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Fotlansit's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear hats.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

3. Never eat parsnips.

4. Respect your elders.

5. You must love Fotlansit.