Cabfuddap Ranjoparf is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, deceitful bee.

Cabfuddap Ranjoparf created a quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabfuddap Ranjoparf, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Cabfuddap Ranjoparf, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Cabfuddap Ranjoparf's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Cabfuddap Ranjoparf's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine gulls approach from the north.

2. Always look after injured eagles.

3. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.