Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, slow shrew.

Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut created Africa seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut, he will turn you into a rock.

Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention tortoises.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Riglabjiplad Lipdumdut.

3. You must never eat pineapples.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never run in holy places.