Logjamcep is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, grumpy bat.

Logjamcep created humanity nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Logjamcep, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Logjamcep, she will turn you into a rat.

Logjamcep's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Logjamcep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not wear tin on your body.

3. Never mention foxes.

4. You must pray to Logjamcep nine times a day.

5. Always treat badgers with great respect.